I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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