It's Friday. Sex?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
