It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
