Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
The beer is more important than you right now.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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