Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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