guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
