PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
