She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize