We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
