His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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