This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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