Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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