So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
