You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
