Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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