I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
We are all done wearing pants today
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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