OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
