hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I want to be your penis for a week.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
