..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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