At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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