I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
