GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
foreskin is a definite game changer
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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