Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I smell like Dick and happiness
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
