Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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