So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
