Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
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