i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
