party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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