It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
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