love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
