if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
