me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize