going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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