She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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