I can tuck mytits in my pants
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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