I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
