no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
