I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
His hands were made for my vagina.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
It's not a walk of shame if you run
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Randomize
