then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
