he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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