We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
