when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
false alarm, still single
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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