oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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