That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
