i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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