i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
