break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
