Define "chronic" masturbator.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
NoShamevember. You game?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
