Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
what day is it and did you see me today?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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