this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
i drank out of a bidet.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I need water and some morals
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
